The best stories are the ones that stick with you long after the interview is over.
That’s how I feel about my experience profiling Jeff Perkins.
Jeff, AKA DJ PBNJEFFY, is a perfect combination of effortlessly cool and grounded. When my mentor, Katie, and I walked into his University City apartment, we were warmly welcomed with hugs and the comforting scent of incense.
After settling into our interview set up, Jeff went on to talk about his journey and grappling with self-doubt along the way. I couldn’t help but relate.
Throughout my life — and especially in my adult years — I’ve had difficulty trusting myself, my ideas, judgment and talents. A prime example of this is when I applied to this very program. I loved my pitch, but had a really hard time believing anyone else would. When I had a pre-interview with Jeff to initially learn more about him and his story, I expressed doubt that I would be chosen. He quickly spoke affirmation over me.
“You will,” he said. “I’m manifesting it for you.”
After I received the news that I was chosen and met with Katie over video call for the first time, she emphatically expressed her excitement about my idea.
“Really?” I remember thinking to myself. I probably replied to her with the same surprise.
I’m constantly at odds with my perception of myself versus how others see me. It makes me sad to admit, but I downplay my talents more often than not, and I have a history of vetoing my ideas before anyone else can. I sell myself short.
Much like Jeff, though, my community gives me strength. Throughout the long days of NPR NextGenRadio, the community we — the mentors, fellow reporters, and editors — built continued to lift me up. In moments of doubt and uncertainty, Katie supported me and encouraged me to rest. One night we even had to make a pinky promise that I would. (And I did. Pinky promises are sacred and not to be broken!) Despite only knowing each other for a week, she knew when I would get in my head, and, whether she realized it or not, she used her charm and kindness to quickly pull me out of a spiral. Most importantly, she and Jeff helped to remind me why I do this work and why I love it, even in the difficult moments: because I love storytelling. It’s innately human and connects us all.
Something that Jeff, Katie, and this experience reminded me is that I can strive to be better in the future, but I also can — and should — celebrate my talents and skills now. Of the many gems that Jeff dropped during our conversation, he had one quote — which he borrowed from the icon herself, Mrs. Beyoncé Knowles — that resonated the moment I heard it:
“I’m a great DJ now and in the making.”
How powerful is that? To have the confidence to proclaim greatness in the present, but also the self-awareness to realize that growth is not linear, nor definitive?
As someone who consistently harps on the latter, I’m choosing to look at this experience as a measure of progress as well as motivation to continue progressing.
To borrow the verbiage passed down from one icon to another, I’m leaving NPR NextGenRadio knowing this:
I am a great journalist now and in the making.